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This is an old post from like 2 months ago that I meant to edit, but didn’t have time to. I’m posting it anyway, because I still think it’s insightful about my life in Seoul and the things I went through. Enjoy my broken English, haa.
Below this post is FINALLY a new post about ‘Nam.
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man, i’m so delayed with these updates… i wanted to write earlier in the week, but just couldn’t get myself to write in a way that i was pleased with. (my english is also deteriorating. i’ve been dropping articles and mixing tenses, having to simplify my speech for the students at work. i start a lot of sentences with “first of all” since i’m teaching them how to use transitional phrases in multi-paragraph essays. so sorry about the hasty writing style.) to sum up, my days have been really catatonic – it’s been mostly pleasant the last few weeks, but there were indeed a couple of really hellish days. i’ve gone sightseeing and visited a couple of historic places, and that’s definitely made me a lot happier. i’ve decided stressing out about work is useless. the job shouldn’t be a priority for me. i’m here to enjoy myself and my time here, right? and not just waste my energy at the hakwon all day long.
okay, quick summary of work (i will definitely have to go into more detail about this later, because there are a lot of interesting cultural differences that i’ve been shocked to learn in the school environment):
have i mentioned that the schooling system is insane here? the parents are insane. the kids are insane. the whole system is insane. with some classes, the most poorly behaved ones, i’m essentially a glorified babysitter. i can’t tell if the kids misbehave because they’re taking all of their anger and hatred of the system and their parents out on me, or if they’re simply spoiled kids – i think it’s both.
but some days, i do sympathize with the kids. if the kids don’t do their homework, are late or are absent, i have to tell the front desk people, who call the parents. often, i hear the next day that they got yelled at by their parents. one really adorable and good student forgot to do his homework one day and begged me not to call his house, or else he wouldn’t be able to come to school on monday (this was a friday). i asked him why, to which he said that he’d be too badly bruised to come to school. um, yeah. another got yelled at for a couple of hours. it’s really pretty insane. then i asked them if they loved their parents and they automatically said yes. i don’t get it. i mean, my parents were pretty strict with me too, but i don’t know. i was shocked and unnerved to hear these things…
i really didn’t realize the whole idea of “saving face” was a big cultural thing here (because it’s pretty subtle), but it is. that’s why so many of the kids don’t participate, because they don’t want to embarass themselves. and here i am, a thoroughly American teacher (who, by the way, doesn’t know any of the pop starts, celebrities, historical figures, or Olympic athletes of korea – EXTREME SHOCK FROM THE STUDENTS, like the whole class gasped in horror and disappointment) trying to teach the class American-style.
but because the kids DO know that i’m American and we’re supposedly easier to manipulate and nicer than Korean teachers, and because they know that i’m one of the younger teachers with less experience, the kids really do try to test my limits. they try to break you (me). really, they do. also, teachers used to get a lot more respect even in the ’80s or ’90s, but with the advent of the internet, cell phone cameras and small video cameras, they haven’t. why? back in the day, teachers used to be able to use corporal punishment. but not anymore… because kids started taking photos of their bruises and whatnot and posting them all over the internet. parents have also begun spoiling their children immensely. and although teaching was considered a respected profession even through the ’90s, it’s less so now…
anyway, where i was going with this is that kids are less fearful and respectful of teachers. plus, i’m a young Korean American. so they talk back and stand up to me even more. i had to kick a kid out of class early last week, but he didn’t even budge. there’s also a way of talking in Korean that’s really rude (opposite of the honorific) and some of them had started using that. i took a kid aside after class earlier this week and he just said right to my face, “i don’t want to talk to you” and turned around and left. this is the shit i’ve been dealing with.
PLUS, so many kids, even the good ones, expect you to get them snacks for class (this is very common). and they’ll ask for things. it’s weird. but yeah, they want you to buy things for them! it’s insane. and they say, well, you’re older so you should buy us things.. this is a cultural thing – older people do really buy lunch for the younger people all the time. for instances, my relatives give me money all too frequently. each week, they give me an allowance of $100! i’ve started refusing, because honestly, it’s nice, but they don’t need to give me money and i feel awkward accepting so much.
the kids make fun of me often, because i can’t speak korean and they will say things in korean to test my comprehension level and what not. they also talk about me among themselves like i’m invisible and can’t hear them. for instance, “the teacher has a small face.” and i responded, “oh really?” as in, “i heard you” but they remain unfazed. or they will talk about weight in front of you. “does Min teacher weigh more than 45 kg?” um yeah…
the maturity level of most kids is SO LOW! i thought a lot of them were in middle school, like 13 or 14 – 15 at the absolute oldest. but a lot of them are 17 or 18. some of the kids are so adorable, but really, they’re devilish. also, the kids, admins, and teachers alike all gossip so much.
oh yeah, i used the word “fucking” in one of my worst classes and got in a little bit trouble for it. yeah.. i was so frustrated and said “this will get you a fucking zero.” the kids immediately told the front desk and some even told their moms. i mean, fucking asshole kids. BUT.
there’s a big but. i’ve dropped two of my classes (those classes with the worst kids), and have a much lighter schedule now, and i love the kids i have in the mornings in the remaining classes i teach. but then, there’s the whole thing of becoming TOO friendly with them. they want my facebook/myspace/cyworld (a korean social network i don’t have), they want to visit me, they want to TAKE ME PLACES like this island called Jeju island (one female student told her mom about me. and now her mom and her both want me to visit her hometown – Jeju Island which is a super nice kinda tropical island that’s a plane ride away. like whattt??). they want to hang out with me. i mean, this is a little overboard. i know other teachers are more lenient in a lot of ways, buying their kids lunch and stuff, but i would never do that. and to hang out with them on weekends? i mean, some of the kids are cool.. but like, this is kinda weird.
so apologies for the delay in updates. a brief synopsis: my last day at the hakwon (the tutoring center) was two fridays ago, and right after class (consisting of parties with my remaining, mostly good students), i took off for gwangju, a city about 4 hours south of seoul. i visited and couchsurfed for a night, then took an hour-long bus to mokpo, and from there, took a 4 hour ferry to jeju island (a prestine island in the south), where i stayed for 3 nights, again through couchsurfing. after that, i took an hour-long plane up to busan, was there for a night, and came back to seoul late last wednesday night. phew!
but the trip wasn’t without some glitches along the way. when i got to mokpo on the bus, i immediately hopped in a cab to try to catch the ferry that was leaving from the ferry terminal in 10 minutes. just as i got to the terminal, the ferry had left. i was exasperated – hands flailed up in the air, heavy sigh (scream?). i went to the ticket desk and asked whether there was another ferry leaving that night. the woman said there was, but that there weren’t any seats left. oh, i begged and begged, nearly cried. told her that i didn’t mind standing, but she explained that there was a limit to the number of people they could have. she told me i could stay the night in the town and catch the ferry the next morning. i told her i couldn’t do that, that i had a friend to meet. and that i didn’t see a lot of people waiting in the terminal, it couldn’t possibly be entirely full. finally, her manager came, and through some stroke of luck, agreed to let me on the next ferry! i don’t know how or why, but i’d finally gotten a seat, and i was soooo relieved, because i didn’t know anything about mokpo or where i would even stay had i had to sleep in the town for a night. phew! i was saved.
anyway, it was a lot of traveling in a very short amount of time. luckily, korea’s only about the size of new jersey, so going from place to place didn’t take too long. speaking of which, some stats. yes, korea’s really that small. there are 50 million people – that’s greater than the entire population of canada in an area the size of indiana. or, in another perspective, it’s kind of like the entire population of california, plus about 12 million more, in an area nearly 5 times smaller than cali.
did i mention how big seoul is (in area and in population)? i think, including greater seoul (the immediate, circular metropolitan area surrounding the city proper), there are somewhere around 16-18 million people living here. and as far as physical size, seoul is HUGE, huge, i tell you. it’s much much bigger than new york. it takes about an hour and 30 min to go from one end of the city to the other on the subway – a complicated maze of 12 lines. and i think the diameter’s about 12 miles. HUGE. very easy to get lost. a web of streets, side streets and alleys.
did i also mention how expensive seoul is? yes. i have to mention this again. i’ve found that it’s possible to seek cheap things but it’s just not that easy to save and budget smartly here. for quality items (in terms of food, clothing, and just.. things), you have to shell out a lot of wons (the korean currency). an american friend of mine put it best, i think – the money runs so fast, you’re almost convinced you’re spending monopoly money – fake money to which you think you have an endless supply. in reality, you can find yourself looking at an empty wallet after having just withdrawn money a few hours earlier. you could easily blow $100 in one night out in seoul. and due to the everpresent capitalist culture, it’s so easy to spend.
not including rent, i’ve spent upwards of $1380 in the entire 7 weeks i’ve been here (NOT including rent). i am dead serious, believe you me. i just looked at my bank statement and i’ve withdrawn $730. in addition, i brought $200 in cash with me from the states, received $350 in cash from my aunt (she gave me a weekly allowance of $100 plus 50 bucks for the first 3 weeks until i insisted she stop), and received $100 from my uncle as spending money before my trip last week. i’m sure there’s other cash i’m forgetting.. again, this is not including my rent for the past month (the closet-sized dorm room was $550, $200 of which the hakwon subsidized). this is also not including my airfare and the other pre-travel expenses before i flew out which was well over a grand, i think close to 3 actually. $1500 in flight, $400 for immunization crap that i should’ve just gotten in korea to save some bucks (health costs are cheaper here), $70 travel guides which i could’ve bought on the road, some travel items and gear like plug converter, etc. that’s an average of $187.14 a week. how?! i mean , i guess i ate out quite a bit (i couldn’t cook for myself) and went out wednesdays or thursdays and fridays and saturdays. but again, i haven’t bought much of anything else. a few souvenirs here and there, but really not much. ah! hopefully, southeast asia will be better to me financially and i won’t continue to run into this problem.
still, i’ve saved up a bit from my teaching job, and i’m hoping it’ll last me at least a month and a half including airfare around that region. but depending on how long i plan to travel for, i’m sure i’ll have to use additional money thereafter, and definitely for my flight back to the states, whenever that is…
my daily routine consists of going to the hakwon to teach in the mornings, then coming back to the goshiwon by around 10 am or 12 pm depending on the day (i dropped some of my worst classes, so my schedule’s gotten a lot lighter – had to have another teacher take over and handle the mess). and by around the early afternoon, i have to leave the dorm because it’s frighteningly TINY. probably 8 X 6. it’s only about big enough for a twin bed, a small desk and a minute bathroom (a sink and toilet). i don’t even want to attempt to take a picture of it to show you guys how small it is – it’s really a scary existence. this is a dorm that’s generally for postgrad students studying for bar exams and government exams.. but also, i found out that a lot of other random people, like bar girls, live in goshiwons too (not mine in particular, but in many others) because it’s cheaper than a studio apartment which runs around $1000 at the minimum in this part of seoul.
this is the street right by my hakwon and goshiwon:
i then generally roam around my neighborhood or some other part of seoul by myself, unless it’s a thurs/friday, in which case i might meet up with a teacher-friend. generally, there’s plenty for me to see and do (well, ‘do’ is a relatively ambiguous word; it can consist of shopping if i’m feeling ambitious, eating, or sightseeing). today, i got lost for about an hour, as i wanted to avoid asking for directions both from koreans and americans alike.
on my walk, i discovered a TASTI DLITE! in KOREA? OMFGWTF?!
when i get home, i’ll sometimes watch tv. mostly american shows that i never dared watch in the states (like american idol, america’s next top model, hell’s kitchen), the olympics, or a korean variety talk show called ‘beautie’s chatter’ which features young, 20-something foreign women from around the world who speak korean semi-fluently and talk about the differences between their native and korean culture (stereotypes, lifestyle, etc). this show’s pretty funny actually and interesting. the girls’ korean languages skills are better than mine but i can still generally understand what’s going on.
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the weekends vary dramatically.. only thing consistent is that i hardly ever come back before 4 am. 4:30 or 5 am is standard. as i said in a previous post, people are out at all hours of the night, and because the subway starts running again at 5, they’d rather just socialize and stay out then go home early. also, lights are always on everywhere, and therefore harder to keep track of time.
this past weekend, i went out after hwaeshik (the company dinner) with a coworker named Michelle who surprisingly invited me out that night to a club – i say “surprisingly” because i really don’t know her all that well and as i’d mentioned before, i didn’t think i had any allies at my hakwon (the tutoring center). it involved about five tequila shots at a club called Mass with some other gyopos (korean americans).
it was unexpectedly fun. people don’t dance as energetically (for the lack of a better word) as in the states, but it was dancing nonetheless.
friday was a holiday, although i’m not sure which holiday exactly (heh). that night, i went to a casino for a friend of a friend’s birthday shindig. the casino is only open to foreigners as gambling’s illegal in korea. so with my passport in tow (wouldn’t wanna be mistaken for a local), we went but left pretty soon after to noraebang (karaoke) near my neighborhood. dude, i’ve never been a huge fan of karaokeing back in the states, but once i’m back, i may just come back a karaoke queen.
then saturday, i went to suwon, about 40 minutes south of seoul, to chill with a couple of friends and went out to an expat bar around there. of course, outside the bar, some military dudes were causing a ruckus and gearing to start a fight. they disappeared soon after, thankfully. typical stupid american behavior.
as i said, i’m finally getting used to life here. as far as language issues, i find that i can usually ask for things like food or the subway station or the bathroom, but i have trouble understanding them back. sometimes, i just don’t say anything when i go into a store as the store reps welcome customers, since i just don’t feel so confident about my korean, and then they think i’m weird or deaf or something. i’m getting a little better though. i was really frustrated with my language skills before and was trying to avoid talking as much as possible, but now, i just try to speak in my broken korean whenever i can. i’ve realized, they actually become friendlier and curious to know where i’m from… and luckily, i’m starting to like it here.
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oh, i forgot to share this story. happened a couple of weeks ago..
one day, the a/c was off in my classroom and i couldn’t find the remote (a/cs have remotes here). but a few moments later, it magically, automatically turned on. i looked around trying to see if a student had found the remote, but it wasn’t anywhere to be seen. i asked the class. still no remote. it turns out… dun dun dun, CELL PHONES have remotes! yes! remotes to electronic devices! like remotes to tvs, A/Cs, anything that can be programmed somehow.. hard to imagine, yeah i know! WTF. needless to say, i was awe-struck and couldn’t believe my eyes. jaw dropped for about an entire minute, and i just kept staring at the kids. how can cell phones have remotes that can control a/cs found anywhere nearby??! this place is insanely intense, technologically.
also, in subways and elsewhere, people carry these weird MP3/PDA thingies or nintendo gameboy-lookalikes that aren’t actually gameboys or PDAs, but used as mp3s, dvd players and live tv players on the subway. tvs. on a cellphoney-mp3 thing. on the subway. that wouldn’t happen for like, 20 years in new york. instead of reading on the subway, people watch live tv on their little MP3 ipod-y thing.
this is it for today, i can’t write any longer. i don’t know what it is, but i have these urges to write but then i write in this terrible fashion i’m not happy with and i get really annoyed with myself. yet i’m too tired to think or do anything about it. so with that, i’m going to read eat pray love. or watch tv.
so i went out for the first time on friday and again last night (saturday), and was introduced to the nightlife here – well, at least the ex-pat’s nightlife. so far, i can’t tell whether koreans tend to drink much or not, i’m glad to know that most americans like to get nicely drunk wherever they are in the world.
oh, first, pics from week 2: http://www.flickr.com/photos/28819999@N08/sets/72157606394135264/
pretty poor quality once again, so apologies..
ex-pat culture here, let me tell you, is… interesting. i already had some notions about it, and to see and experience it in person definitely solidified some of those ideas.
there are two kinds of foreigners here:
type 1 – people who are educated, are actually interested in korean or eastern culture, history and language, want to travel, and/or have a genuine interest in being an English teacher or education as a career. these people are generally recent grads.
type 2 – people who left home to get away from something (perhaps a troubled past?) and start anew, didn’t have anything going for them back in the states or wherever they’re from, knew they could make a lot of cash here, and/or are interested in asian women.
about 70% of the ex-pats here are of the latter category. many of the americans i’ve met here are from small towns in the midwest or the south, are a little red-necky, and aren’t very educated, much less qualified to teach. (this is partly because korean expat culture started after the korean war with men of that type 2 quality, and some of the remnants of that old culture still exist now. whereas expat culture in, say, shanghai or hong kong started much earlier through business, trade and british colonialism, although i hear there’s expat seediness in those places as well..) anyway, the overarching reasons that nearly all young ex-pats are here – $$$ and nightlife. it really comes down to those two things.
so guys, if you want to make a lotta dough without much effort, come to Seoul. qualifications are fairly loose, as long as you have some post-secondary education from any crappy college and are a native english speaker. you will get paid handsomely, won’t work very much, and the koreans will treat you very well because they love white people. you probably won’t have to go through as much of the bullshit i go through at the tutoring center i work at, as they’ll at least try to be more accomodating. in the words of a douchey guy from some random small town in manitoba i met last night, “they treat us like god” – ‘us’ being caucasian. by the by, this dude has been in korea for three years, hardly speaks ANY korean, and is marrying a korean girl in the fall.
speaking of korean girls, if you have an asian fetish (or yellow fever, as they call it), you’ll find a bonus. seriously, every white dude i’ve ever seen on the streets here is with some korean chick, and every white dude i’ve talked to so far has either had a korean girlfriend, is currently dating one, or is about to marry one… most dudes can’t speak korean and have no intention of learning the language (as in the case i just mentioned), and likewise, most girls can’t speak much english either. i wonder what some of these girls are thinking. although there are definitely some cool guys, many are pretty dumb, but think and act like they’re the shit. i guess it just goes to prove that white dominance and privilege is still very much alive around the world…
but that’s not to say there aren’t a lot of cool people here. don’t get me wrong. i met some cool german girls who’re exchange students and both half-asian through a friend of a family friend, and barhopped with them to the places they hang out at in shinchon.
we went to three bars that expats frequent. the first place, mike’s cabin, was on the sleazier side. a few korean girls were there with their friends hoping to pick up white men. and the guys were so clearly checking all the girls out, and kept coming by our and other tables to try to talk. the caliber was pretty low. reminded me a little of bar none in the east village.
drinks are comparable to nyc. a hoegaarden was 6,000 won (so about $6; 1000 won = ~$1). but cheap beers (think similar to pabst or bud light) are about $3. (seoul’s cost of living really is about the same as nyc. some food is cheap, but even then, that’s solely bc it’s street food, kind of like getting a falafel or shawarma in the city. most meals here are anywhere from $6 for lunch specials and up, depending on the quality of the place you go to. a standard filling meal ranges between $12-20. i know some of you have the notion that seoul would seem cheap because it’s asia and you probably think that korea’s not a first-world country, but you’ve got the wrong idea, or been fed the wrong impression through western media. it’s not as expensive as tokyo, but it’s up there.) you can also drink on the street (no open container law, although it’s frowned upon), so a lot of people get beer at 7 eleven and drink on their way to the bars, rather than buy them in the bars themselves.
anyway, while we were out, i asked one of the two girls what the dating scene was like. she told me that because all the foreigners know that none of them are really here to stay for the long haul and because they don’t know whether or not the foreigners they’re seeing have partners back home, cheating is pretty frequent in this community. in her words, “everyone’s fucking everyone” (germans know how to put it best). hmm, good to know.
before we knew it, it was 4:30 am. i don’t know why, but time flies faster here, or at least it never seems late, maybe because there are always people out at all hours of the night. the subway stops service at around midnight, so the only option was a cab ride home – $17. during the ride, i continued an old habit that i picked up in ny – talking to cabbies on the way home after a long night. this guy in his late 40s spoke fairly good english and i was surprised. i asked him where he learned it, and it turns out that he was formerly a banker at merrill lynch, before he got laid off some years back during the asian financial crisis. i wasn’t sure how i should feel about him – whether to feel sorry or what, but he seems like he’s doing all right.
oh man, probably boring you guys… props if you made’ve it this far in the blog. saturday night, we went out with some american teachers (really, everyone’s an english teacher here) that we met the night before. mostly americans from the west or midwest and some canadian fellows. a couple of them are getting married to korean chicks and most others have serious girlfriends (though take ’serious’ however you will). we went to a posh hookah bar – a dim candle-lit place, where we sat at tables with plush cushions on the floor. each seating area was an island surrounded by water with floating flower petals – lush. after some time there, we went to hongdae, the hip area that’s the ’spot’ to go out to, not before stopping by 7 eleven for some beer. we were supposedly going to go to some more bars (even possibly a gay bar in itaewon, which is the ex-pat/foreign neighborhood in seoul), but couldn’t decide on going anywhere and just sat outside on some steps and drank (this is not uncommon). while we were sitting around and chillin, a man selling makgulli (rice wine) came by with his cart. he’s well known, frequenting that street at night to sell makgulli to all the foreigners hanging out. evidently, the people i was with knew him, and he gave us a ‘deal’ and sold us a bottle for $2. that mixed with soju (similar to sake), with beer, with wine, with hookah and cigarettes is not the best combination. therefore, i puked (not something i do frequently at all and try to avoid at all costs) at around 4:30 am (again) and it was time to go home. some wild times…
some days, i don’t even feel like i’m in another country. the lifestyle here is a lot like that of new york, but with a few new sights and differences that’s 5x faster paced. i should note that i have visited this country before, although it was 12 years ago, and i am korean ethnicity, so i guess you could write it off as me being more familiar with this place than say a true foreigner. but an american friend i just made feels the same way. it’s so western here that sometimes i feel the only difference is the people. or at other times, i feel like i’m simply in koreatown in flushing, new jersey or LA… boston red sox and yankees caps aren’t uncommon, nor american brand clothing (as i mentioned before). and a week later, i’m still surprised each time by the abundance of americanness surrounding me. krispy kreme, dunkin donuts, the coffee bean, bennigans, even a hooters, they’re all here…
a couple things that are different:
- there are no street signs beyond the major streets, so i rely totally upon directions and trust from others. it’s a confusing feeling not knowing where exactly i am at any point. and because i don’t have a map other than the subway map and didn’t buy a guidebook for seoul or korea, i’m probably not making the most of my time here in figuring out all the places i should check out and sightsee.
- cigs are cheap here! $2.50 a pop. i might become a smoker just because it’s so cheap.
- the same friend i made the other night and i both decided that it’s very hard to make friends here. i’m lucky that i had a family friend around my age to show me around for a bit the first few days. but overall, it’s hard. the locals here (the koreans) are either totally family-oriented or home-bodies (like on the part of my family friend, who doesn’t really like to go out); they’re also simply aren’t known to reach out to strangers they’ve just met. the americans can be a hit or miss depending on whether they’re type 1 or type 2; and as i mentioned, my work environment is kinda whack.
this is just a musing, but it’s weird to learn how koreans think of me. some, when they first meet me and hear that i’m from the states, applaud my ‘good’ korean and are fascinated that i can speak it at all. but others, when they find out that i was born in korea, applaud my good english even as i tell them that i moved when i was a toddler, grew up in the states my entire life, and AM american, feel american, and identify with being an american. i don’t know why simply having been born in korea has anything to do with my english language skills when i clearly grew up in the states, haven’t been to this country in so many years, and haven’t lived here for even longer – some twenty years! it’s just weird when i know that they’re attempting to conceptualize me and put me in a box… people in the states do that too, but it’s funny to see it coming from the other side.
friday morning, i was greeted by excessive humidity and rain as i left the goshiwon (the dorm where i live) to get to class. and to match the gloomy weather, my day was about to get painfully worse.
but before i get into that, here’s a little background of what i do: i work at a hakwon (tutoring center) teaching TOEFL from 8 am to 6 pm (with a 2 hr lunch break) on mon/wed/fri, and from 8 to 10 am on tues/thurs. the hakwon, simply put, is fucked up. you see, there are millions of hakwons in korea. every korean child attends after-school tutoring and extra classes every day, even during the summers. life can be hard here for these kids. the school and education system are insane, and parents push kids over the edge. incidentally, i think korea, after japan and sweden, had the third highest suicide rates back in the ’80s and ’90s, though i don’t know if it’s related to the school system or just life in general here..
at my hakwon, there is very little organization and management behind the administration. a preview of last week’s admin issues: i had initially been told i would teach the SAT, which was indeed what i wanted to do. but the first day i got there a few days before classes began for “training,” i was told that i would be teaching TOEFL, which i’ve never taught and knew barely anything about. secondly, they didn’t have the books i needed on hand. i had to come in on a saturday and pick them up to prep for the first class last monday. among the problems is the manager, john, a clueless idiot who doesn’t even know he is one. he has very little educational background, and yet, he’s in charge of ordering everyone else around. i wasn’t given a class list nor told what classroom i’d be teaching in until the morning of the first class. nor was i told how i should structure my classes and plan my lessons. nor that on tuesday and wednesday, the kids had a practice test and wouldn’t have class, saving me time and energy. it’s just bullshit after bullshit after bullshit. i’ve been getting really fed-up over the last week. already.
anyway, on friday, on top of the usually admin bs, some of the kids were driving me insane. many are so poorly behaved – terribly chatty, loud and rude. half come to class late. they talk back constantly. the only way to scare them is by telling them to go out into the hallway or that i’m going to call up their moms. these kids have real issues, and i think a number of them could use serious corporal punishment, disciplining, or drugs to subdue their manic behavior. i’m only kidding. or… am i.
other students simply don’t care to learn and participate. there are a number of narcissistic boys who even check themselves out in pocket mirrors and constantly fix their hair during class. others text message friends or watch tv shows on their cells, and just don’t give a flying fuck. if i ask them a question, no one ever volunteers. the thing is, they’re all spoiled brats. they live in the richest part of seoul, and go to prep schools in the states during the school year. i’m not even explaining myself fully. but it’s suffice to say, it’s entirely frustrating, and after just one week, i might’ve reached the last straw.
so after classes on fri, i told john, the idiot manager who’s also been putting a lot of pressure on me since i’m new, that i might quit after this upcoming week. not only can i not deal with the stress from him and the admin, but i hate teaching TOEFL (i get $35/hour but it’s really not that much if you include how much prep time i put in) and the teaching environment (admin, teachers, students) sucks. the other teachers are excessively clique-y, and though outwardly friendly, i can sense the superficiality. for instance, there is a group of about 6 ot 7 teachers that go to lunch together just by themselves every day, and fittingly but also conceitedly, call themselves “the lunch bunch.” on friday, for some reason, one of them invited me to come along. i joined, but it was a little weird. and towards the end of lunch, justin asked me, jokingly yes but nonetheless pretentiously, if i enjoyed lunch with them, and proceeded to tell me that they don’t just let anyone join in and that there’s a, har-har, ‘application process.’ right.
so i’m going to reach some sort of decision about whether i feel up to continuing to work at this place after my classes tomorrow. we’ll see how things go…
i’ll preface this post by saying that i’m going to write a lot of my posts in a sort of a stream of consciousness style, so don’t judge me on the writing nor my photography skills! i’ve almost always been pressed for time so far while trying to take pics and use the web. there’s access to the internet everywhere, but so far, i haven’t really had a block of time to myself to gather my thoughts, much less write anything down. this is also hard to do when i don’t have my own computer, and i’m constantly borrowing someone else’s things..
SO. this is going to be a short update. i have a ton of thoughts going through my head – about the city, about the people, about the culture, about the place i’m working at, the list goes on… suffice to say, a lot is different. but strangely, a lot is also the same…
here are some pictures i’ve taken so far: http://www.flickr.com/photos/28819999@N08/sets/72157606264635108/
you’ll notice i took a lot of pics of american franchises.. i didn’t know there would be so many! pizza hut, domino’s, 7 eleven, subway, outback steakhouse, tgi friday’s, starbucks (given), cold stone, smoothie king. there are wayyy too many..
i even saw the picture of an amherst girl, that tall skinny chick, at an american apparel store!
i have to go prep for class tomorrow, but i’ll try to write something substantial sometime later in the week…
for now, a couple of quick thoughts:
- Seoul is huge, and it’s a lot cleaner than I thought. Much cleaner than New York.
- This place is not cheap. I’ve already spent a couple hundred bucks here in a couple of days, and that’s factoring in the fact that I’ve had several meals paid for me, haven’t pay for housing (yet), haven’t gone out, and have been extremely budget-conscious.
- The women are ridicufuckinglously fashionable here. I look really shabby compared to them in my flip flops and t-shirt. Most almost always wear make-up, heels and really fancy, trendy clothing. I’ve even been told by my aunt that I don’t look “American” (which I presume means that I’m not as trendy as I should be??).
- I go back and forth between thinking the people here are friendly and warm and unfriendly and angry. Kind of like NYC in some ways, I guess…
- Some things seem SO American and Western, and yet others don’t. Elaborations to come later.
- I haven’t gone out yet, and am really curious to experience the night life.
- I haven’t decided if the young people here are sexually repressed or not. I’ve seen a lot of young couples here holding hands and seeming very touchy feely, but I have no idea what else that means as it’s still taboo to talk (much less ask) about sex out in the open.
- There is a very strange dichotomy between the good, studious, respectable young people and the ones who are less so and more progressive and/or rebellious in their social views.. I’m not sure that I understand it, and am curious to learn more.
- There are a lot more white people here than I thought there would be. A lot are here to teach and party. There are even TV shows (variety shows, reality shows, game shows and the like) with only foreigners as the contestants.
- Technology is so far ahead of the States and so ubiquitous, it’s kind of ridiculous.. For instance, my grandmother has a fairly old cell phone by Korean standards (about a year old), and yet, it has live TV on it and it’s totally free. Cell phones also have subway maps and dictionaries as free features. These are only a few of the many hi-tech aspects… (These are also, of course, the iphone-like cells.. Many many varieties that are touch-screen and I do not know or understand what features they have on them – no doubt everything imaginable and more.)
- The consumer culture here is also ridic. Materialism is abundant and almost openly encouraged.
- It hurts my head to try to talk in Korean so much already. I’m not very fond of speaking it as it feels rough and foreign to my tongue (mostly because I’m not at all good at it), and having to speak it nearly all the time is really painful. Hopefully, once the tutoring classes start, I won’t have to speak it as much, since I’ll be in class with students who are technically required to speak to me only in English (although the kids are pretty poorly behaved so this could easily backfire).
- People use the honorific here for even people who are only a year older than them. If you know French or Japanese, this might be familiar (for instance, in French, using the vous instead of the tu). I find this really bizarre. Even friends often use this kind of language. Kids start using the honorific with their peers of a grade or year older at around middle school (SO strange). It goes without saying that they use the honorific with almost all adults.
- I want to elaborate on how Koreans perceive America and its people in a later post.. It’ll also be interesting to contrast it to what people in SE Asia think about the States, too..
- This is my first day alone and I’ve spent most of it just prepping for class tomorrow. Hopefully, I’ll get to explore the city by myself or with other foreigners soon.
